I have been seeing a guy for over a year, and I thought we had a solid relationship. We got on famously and he was very attentive. We had been planning our future, even talking about marriage and children and everything was looking rosy. Out of the blue at the end of February my boyfriend was contacted by his ex-wife. They had split four years previously with her telling him that she no longer loved him, so he left. Then in March, the virus hit and suddenly we were in lockdown. He works away and so said he had to stay where he was because the police would not allow him to travel to another province. Since then we have kept in touch by messaging and video call. But things haven’t felt the same. When I have brought up our future plans in the conversation, and he was reluctant to talk about it. Something has changed. He admitted that he was speaking with his ex and that she wanted to get back together, which has upset me greatly. Two days ago we spoke on video call and it looked to me as though he was not at the same residence, although he said he was and just in a room that he had not called from before. I strongly suspect he is with his ex wife. I asked him if he still loved me and if he still wanted to get married, and he said of course he was ‘fond of me’, but we would have to talk about the future when we are able to meet.
Saying that he is ‘fond of you’ is rather different than saying he loves you. He also said you needed to talk when you next saw each other. You suspected something had changed, and I think you may be right. I think sadly the writing could be on the wall and he may well be back with his ex wife, or at least planning on it. You could ask him outright next time you speak to him. Personally I wouldn’t delay a frank talk – this is eating you up and it’s better to know where you stand.